How Embracing Diversity Increases Self-Acceptance

Summer leached into fall this year. So we stole one more Saturday at the beach before the cold locked us out for the season.

At the water’s edge, my sister and I flip off our sandals and post up in our bright orange floral printed beach chairs. While the whisper of the water lures most of the beachgoers, the sea of people surrounding me contend for my attention.

Next to our sandy realestate another family robs a beach-day from Fall and fans out on patches of golden sand and scattered driftwood. No one in their family schlepped bulky chairs or floaty devices to beach today. The seaside provides her own welcome mat.

An elder of the family stretches his legs out on the warm sand and lowers himself to the ground. He rests his head on a smooth piece of driftwood. An arm reaches up to shade his eyes from the sun glare as the sea beckons his gaze.

His short spiky black hair and a goatee trim his 60 something year old peanut butter colored face. A short sleeved button down tucks into his pleated and almost, but not yet, threadbare work pants. His naked toes point to the sky, and I feel God’s presence hovering over this beach wide family reunion.

Then a young mother clutching a wiggly toddler’s hand eclipses my nosy stakeout. Velvety black hair frames her soft caramel colored features. Its thick tresses flow behind her like a veil.

She’s wearing a tea length royal blue colored dress, with large red and pink intricately embroidered flowers edging the hem. Its thick rich fabric gathers at the waist, and the fitted, yet modest, bodice hosts the same embroidered flowers. Fluttering short sleeves encircle her upper arms. I’ve never seen a dress like it at the local mall.

She looks in our direction, and briefly, her dark brown eyes meet mine.

I wondered, does she always go to the beach in custom made dresses?

Today this beautiful young momma serves her family in a uniform of gorgeous blue, and I in cutoffs and flip flops. I chuckle to myself. I love the contrast.

Another couple stubbles from the sea, out of breath but giggling and glowing from the exertion. Each dons an extra large life jacket barricading the billowy abdominal girth underneath. His fuzzy belly strains to free itself from the plastic restraints.

“Was it warm?” I ask.

The woman looks up at me. A winter skull cap traps her hair away from her face and neck. A sopping wet long sleeve shirt and pair of pants cling to her body. I smile. She returns the touchless embrace. I point to the sea and ask again.

“ Well, at first no,” she explains, with a hint of an accent, “but you get used to it.”

I spent half my life living near the seaside, and I’ve never seen people spend the day at the beach in rubber life jackets, and embroidered party dresses using driftwood as beach chairs.

That’s just not the way it’s done. Right?

But this secret beach doesn’t have a standard. Women aren’t staring at each others bodies comparing levels of fitness. Almost everyone swims fully clothed.

Missing are coolers full of organic treats and filtered water. Most didn’t even bring chairs or blankets, but no one is out of place. This American beach welcomed us all just the same.

I’ve always put so much pressure on myself to do things the “right” way. Worship and prayer. Eating and exercising. Raising my kids and running a household. The pressure to conform to a standard in my faith and in my home is paralyzing.

But God isn’t constrained by my puny standards. On the beach that day I saw God in every different expression of family, and my rigid heart exhaled a sigh of relief once more.

Dipping into diversity not only frees us from the fear and hatred of those different from us, it also frees us from the contempt we feel toward ourselves when we fail to squeeze ourselves into our own suffocating stereotypes.

Experience the freedom in diversity. America is teaming with it.

As a result, we appreciate the colors and smells and different modes of achieving. It whips off the blinders of narrow self-consciousness. We become creation-conscious which leads us to a deeper God consciousness. We see His glory in His diverse creations and can’t help but worship Him for His endless artistry.

I saw God on the beach that day. He expressed His nature through all of our differences. He savored each family as He mingled through the crowds delighting in the party He created. Many nations were gathered together, in each family’s unique expression, as One under God.

Ideas for Dipping into Diversity.

1. Visit a different denominational church.
2. Read books by authors from various faith backgrounds, gay authors, and authors of color.
3. Pop on a podcast highlighting stories of people with different views and backgrounds than you.
4. Explore different neighborhoods volunteering in their community programs. Make friends and have them over for dinner.
5. Eat at ethnic restaurants and actually talk with the staff.
6. Tutor a refugee.

It may feel uncomfortable at times. Not to worry. We’re not losing our faith, we’re just rattling our stereotypes.